Sometimes you can feel the gears shifting in scripts, like really trying to make something work that feels sweaty for whatever reason. I really enjoy reading material that just flows - it's definitely a skill to make something feel effortless.
I've read many great samples, both of existing shows I liked and original pilots, and definitely hired the writers - or, at least, tried to!
Not everybody can see every moment of their life displayed by one set of people. It's just not going to happen.