内德·阿内尔·门西亚，专业上被称为卡洛斯·门西亚，出生于洪都拉斯的美国喜剧演员、作家和演员。他的喜剧风格通常是政治性的，涉及种族、文化、刑事司法和社会阶层等问题。他最出名的是喜剧中央节目《孟子的心》的主持人，该剧在2008年被取消前制作了四季。
I will make a joke about any of my family members, about me, about my wife, if I really thought that I'm doing it to be funny. If there's some darkness to it, or I think it's ill-willed or mean or not cool, then I won't do it.
如果我真的认为我这样做是为了好玩的话，我会拿我的家人、我自己、我的妻子开玩笑。如果有一些黑暗，或者我认为这是恶意的，卑鄙的或不酷，那么我不会做。
People that love me, love me. But the people that hate me really hate me.
爱我的人，爱我。但是那些恨我的人真的恨我。
I am an extremist.
我是个极端分子。
One of the better moments in life is when you get your own car.
生活中最美好的时刻之一就是你有了自己的车。
When I was younger, I was angry. I was boisterous and loud. I was on top of the mountain, screaming at everybody, 'Look at me!' Now I'm more of a Taoist.
当我年轻的时候，我很生气。我又吵又大声。我站在山顶上，冲着所有人尖叫，“看我！”现在我更像个道士了。
Here's what I know about the business I am in. It's all based on money. It's all based on ratings.
以下是我对我所从事的行业的了解。一切都是基于金钱。这都是基于收视率。
I was never one of those fat-victim people. I always have to address how much weight I lost, and people always realize then how fat I was.
我从来不是那种胖受害者。我总是要说我减掉了多少体重，人们总是意识到那时我有多胖。
Guys like Rogan literally want to ruin my career. That's unbelievably cruel and hurtful, and I never want to be that guy.
像罗根这样的家伙真的想毁了我的事业。这是难以置信的残忍和伤害，我永远不想成为那个人。